rebirth: detachment

of what worth is this dunya, when you have to let go of everything?

nothing.
it's worth nothing.

every moment is temporary, cycling towards the end. every emotion is just an illusion, a perception of pieces of information obtained by our senses. the thoughts in our minds? they're not even real at times.

every single thing we have is just a mere liability from god that we have to be ready to give up when he decides to take them back. sounds scary? it doesn't come as scary to me now, it's rather bliss.

"life is bleak and then we enter an obscure eternity" was written in my bedroom walls because i feared oblivion. but it was before i realize that there's a serenity in knowing that everything will come to an end. all of this will end.

learning again about islam, a religion that i was born and raised in, i found the reason why i was miserable. i forgot the 6 pillars of imaan that i learned in school: belief in allah, the angels, the holy books, the prophets, the judgement day, and the divine decree (qada' and qadar). i lacked the sixth all along because i always knew nothing is harder for me than to just accept my fate and surrender to god's will. now i know that, the higher the imaan a person has, the smaller these worldly problem looks like to him/her. the easier to let go of anything.

it calms me to know that the amount to our lifetime in this dunya (let's say, 60-80 years on average now?) can feel like a mere second in the hereafter, the akhirah. the things we can sense in this dunya is just a glimpse of allah's creation in the eternity. gosh, not a single human will have any idea about how long an eternity is, or how grand and vast the creations of god is. it's exciting. and it's good to know that god keeps his promises.

all in all, it feels comfortable to put your trust in god. all we need to do is just to live in moderation in good and bad times, in easy and hard trials. focus on our deens and leave the rest in god's divine timing. we'll enter the phases of life, including dying, death, and the lives after as god destined us to be. no material things will be with us when we're buried six feet underground and people no longer recall our names.

the lesson is: nothing too much, everything in moderation, and a detachment from worldly matters (ego, things, people, etc). may allah strengthens our imaan and guides us to the right path. may allah makes this journey easy and beautiful for us. may allah grant us jannah. aamiin.

everything we can sense is just a cluster of matter that doesn't matter.